pune express

As i stare hard on my blank notepad screen..yes i dont use ms word,hate when some one tells me my spelling/grammar is wrong..reason mayb i liked maths in school,x+y=7 has a very lil chance of a grammatical error , mayb only if u put capital x or y cuz then the variables change..oh fuck it..shut up..so what was i sayn...so staring hard

on my blank screen..well its not blank now..so thats some progress but the funny buttons on the keyboard are giving me a rough time..."joh bhi likhna chahun barbaad karein keypad mere"..high note, funny cap..i shud be a rockstar(time to buy 'sadda haqq ithe rakh' boxers)..that reminds me..what a bloody nonsensical(if thats a word) movie..if getting

drunk,singing and fighting makes u a fkn rockstar then woodstock wud have been in doaba ..anyways nargis fakhri, respect..but still "main saari rat katrina katrina karu"..cuz thats tru love my friends and waise bhi hum ek baar jeete hai,ek baar marte hai, ek baar pyaar karte etc etc although purists may say that mr khan fell in love twice in that movie,but in my theory he jus did it to fuck up salman's head ,old issues there..so srk 1 sallu 0..game on..too much bollywood happening in this post..but then if you grew up in the 90s you would know it..i mean fuck HD maine 'khiladhiyo ka khilaadhi' theatre mein dekhi hai behnchod..anyways..emotions asides..what else is new..don2..heavy..what else..i think ddlj sequel is due now..cuz then only shah rukh would retire,doubt it thoigh..ok that makes me wonder..how would that go?..dilwale dulhaniya fir se le jayenge..sounds like a movie on remarriage..but fuck it.. lets give it a shot..

Here it goes...

so simran enters the train,we all know that...next stop is delhi where there is a big ass punjabi wedding organised by bittu and shruti ofcourse..shruti taunts simran by singing "rabb ne bana di jodhi",simran is pissed ..they fly back to london the very next day(ghar aaja pardesi is played again in the background but its a thrash metal cover since they are moving back to london with akon on lead and the brits in chorus,well fuck the empire)..but then shit happens..raj n simran move to casablanca for their honeymoon ,where anupam kher has opened a gin joint for raj. .but raj has lost it bigtime and is a raging alcoholic now,seriously who wuldnt be an alcoholic if one owns a gin joint and is on a honeymoon in casablanca that too with simran(imagine old kajol)..one day when simran throws a flying kiss, drunk raj asks if one tip one hand catch is allowed as he is holding his bottle in one hand,thats the day simran stops loving him(tujhe pheka toh yeh jaana sanam)..also raj turns out to be a paedophile as he tries to hit on simran's lil sister when she comes to casablanca for a eurotrip(budhe ki yaadaasht ab itni kamzor nahn hai,doosri beti bhi bhej di europe)..anyways too afraid to tell anyone, she whatsapp kuldeep who still loves simran..kuldeep who is a changed man and has joined Interpol is in casablanca for a undercover operation..his mission is to bust the drug cartel operating from london via casablanca selling fake alcohol in rural punjab..the mission is personal to him as he lost his best hunting buddy back home due to poisionous gin..kuldeep comes to raj as they were bff once and asks for forgiveness..when asked what is he doin in casablanca kuldeep replies "kuch haasil karne aaya hun" when asked what, he replies 'zameer' instead of 'zameen' but raj is not convinced.."well i think its a beginning of a beautiful friendship" quotes simran but raj is apphrensive "Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, he walks into mine.."..meanwhile anupam kher comes to casablanca to see how raj is doin with his business but is unsatisfied..gess what, so is simran..she seeks comfort in kuldeep and sings mehndi laga ke rakhna on a piano when kuldeep says "play it again sim,play it"..raj on the other hand after reading some heavy ayn rand and drinking free booze has grown a beard and has started visiting a harrem where he meets a girl with yellow boots,yellow reminds him of those good old mustard fields of punjab and he falls for her but still cant forget simran and keeps drinking..anupam kher now realises that his son has lost it finds new trustworthy kuldeep as his heir..he ask him to marry simran but raj wouldnt divorce her so they plan to kill him and succeed in it by posioning raj..they decide for a christian wedding as she doesnt shaadi mubaarak part2..now that would suck..so simran marries kuldeep in a beautiful chapel..Ms Bragaanza(ooh la la) who is now dating anupam kher is the maid of honor and anupam kher is the best man..but there is some unknown tension between the groom and the maid of honor(some old issues)..anyways when asked for the ring by the priest,anupam kher doesnt seem to have it so some guy with weird hair and in an all black attire produces the ring and then moves out and does some insane solo guitaring outside the chapel for no fucking reason..(literally begaani shaadi mein abdullah deewana)..ofcourse cigg smoking is injurios to health..

meanwhile anupam kher tells his new son kuldeep that he is indeed the drug lord "SIR JI", a secret that even raj didnt know..but simran who now controls kuldeep by the power of lust is the new leader of the cartel..anupam kher on realising that this was all simran's plan from the starting decides to kill her too but the same night amrish puri comes and saves her..amrish puri shocks anupam kher by telling him that he is the chief of Interpol and he knew xactly what was happening through the microchip he had planted on kuldeep's neck of which even kuldeep didnt know..and now he has found both sirji and the rat in the department kuldeep..kuldeep now tries to shoot amrish puri but raj who was alive and was pretending all the time to be an alcoholic and then laters to be dead(under the orders of Interpol ofcourse)comes in between and kicks some hard ass but simran gets shot in the crossfire and dies..police enters and captures the goons viz anupam kher and kuldeep.. raj takes off his mask and is found that he was hrithik roshan instead(srk and hrithik deal,don2 payback)..and then hrithik takes out the cell from kuldeep and dials..anupam kher picks up and movie ends when hrithik finally confronts his dad by saying.."toh aap hai SirJi" ..

written and directed

by Abbas Mustan..

PS..chotte chotte deshon mein badhi badhi baatein hoti rehti hai..

PS2..mind the grammar/spelling..told you,i use notepad

PS3..http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PlayStation_3

hashing

hi iam lil.codey@gmail.com ..thats my id and thats me..evrybody calls me that..my pc calendar reads 14 may 2063..if the old world was bc,then new world is pc for sure....bout me, iam 14yrs old..thats lotta timestamp if u speak in our lingo..so are we? we are a bunch of kids tryn to code our way in the world of power..we are sm 14 15 yrs old guys and some self proclaimed girls(yeah pretty girls still can't code) or shud i say, budding coders who are aspiring to the big ones when we reach our physical prime..no we dnt want to be some software enggs from sm fancy technical collg..i mean i wud have named my id as lil.softy@gmail.com then..but i didnt..not because the id wud hav given wrong non masculine vibes..well that too..but theres a big diff btwn a coder and a software engg..the one like between a car driver and a f1 racer..and hey that "lil" luks kiddish but i named it when i was jus 3..it ws my 1st email,id and a lotta highscores on the internet are named on it over the years,so dnt wanna change it and spoil my legacy.. we r the gods..we are evrywhr..even the president of US and the queen of england are hotshot coders..yeah good gesswork..queen is not pretty..and nor do i think that princess wud be in future cuz DNA's algorithm cant fk up that bad..so u c the its a world of coders,if u can code u can be anyone...well officially anyone..i mean this our very own proffessor here in india cud hav been both PM of bihar and a senator in some state in US at the same time but smhow the law fkd him up..i mean the plan was good,nor the US or the state of biha givs a fk bout each odr,so no1 wud hav found out..so now he is the head of CID.."daya,darwaza code do"..his famous tweet these days..gupta sir..funny guy and i heard one of the best fifa player in the world...will meet him again this year in our school's alumni meet..i will be the host that time...ha ha local host..bad one..so last year in school and im lukn for the best coding college in the world,a run time environment as thy wud say..any thing to get the rights to log into that site..yea yea its not easy hack that site..its fkn impossibe..i mean the best are defending that site..plus sm genius who crack that automatically get into the collg or sm how get killd in mysteriousness,..so the site is alwaz secured..alwaz..i mean gupta sir is defending the site for linux's sake..heard in his collg days,he online had sex with the wife of itallian PM's wife pretending to be the ambassador of Brazil..the wife thot that the line was secure while the live chat was being transmitted all over the world,"jus for the kicks" he had infamously tweeted..fkd the relationships of both the country..well we all thank him for that amazing fkd up classic football world cup semis a decade back..what a match..the men were killing each other on the field..sm purists believ

that jus for the "kicks" cud have double meanings..i mean we all knw his love for fifa and football so cud that kick in the tweet was deliberate ,did he predict it?? well i think so..the Italian spies were lookn for him..well that made him join the CID and now he hunts them..what a guy..even beated this italian guy in "pick ur nation and play" in yearly fifa confrence last year..yeah he picked india and fkd italy,double whammy..indian team so lousy in fifa..i mean jus like reality..i wonder why we can't play football.."khoon mein nahn hai game saala.."..so instead we code and fuck them online..bet it was more demeaning than actual italian side losin to indian side on real football..the dynamics hav changed..wars are won online..cuz now the real men of a nation are coding and eating pizza and not outside, toiling hard..

so now u see how obsessed iam with coding and this collg..im not the only one, the whole of our fkn generation is obsessed bout it..reasons vary..i mean some are doing cuz their coder parents want them too,sm themselves want to code,fkn nerds...this guy in my tuition wants because he feels coders have the hottest gf,another wants to be a serial killer,kill people on net ..sm girls tryn to prove that thy can code too..sm doin for the money..why iam doing exactly is smthn i dnt knw yet..or maybe i havnt written it down yet..i feel coding is essential today..jus cnt go thru it..i think there has been a transfer of power in the world from the physically stronger to the physically meeker..the power has shifted in this chain chrologicaly..dinosaurs,lions and other predators,stronger early men,smarter early men,large armies to small smart armies,gladiator ruled by a senator..the energy that once came from a single point goin back to a single point..a master server connected by the brains of the smartest ones..its a cycle..the universe will explode the day that server gets fkd up..sounds silly,im a kid,i can dream..and i wanna be a part of that server sm remotely pre mature way for that day is still very far and will obviously elpase my living days easily..i still believ this crap..so i want to leave a legacy..a code that u read,n u whistle out.."woah, thats so typical him" ..a code that inspires a generation..like facebook..that changes life,life style..smthn thats taught in colleges for its simplicity and beauty..for that i wanna learn and join this collg..i mean bein getting selected and bein a part of "those 100" for this year is not a child's play..i have cleared the 1st two rounds..firing a fake nuke missile carryn condoms and a postcard saying from russia wid love near whitehouse ..i bet gupta sir designed this task..bad sense of humor,sex and audacity to fk up nations' sentiments is his signature..plus the complexity of scoring points in this task..the 1st one to do this within one day was given major points..and then as time increased from day one to day 10 points increased exponentially..as the russian defence security also increased..but that didnt mean that u can wait till 10th day and fire yr nuke cuz points were only given to 1st 150 entries only and it was an elimination round..and catch was the diff in number of points from day 1 to day2..it was mindoggln..and so if ure within 150 and fire on day 10..u r pretty much the winner of the whole thing cuz nxt rounds are non eliminative and some total is taken..so u didnt knw...when to fire evn u can fire cuz u didn knw wt numbr was fired and american defence was also defending its ass by not disclosing the figure,a lot of hacking also went thr to find out info from pentagon's database to ..thr ws lotta bluffn..lotsa algorithm considered..i deduced my graph and fired on 8th day..i was later told i was number 137th and 4th that day..so not bad..only 13 guys over me..a total 457 nukes wr fired in those 10 days..307 not considered..thats the standard the collg sets..gettn best 150 outta the cream..and then kicking ass of 50 great minds..second round was a speed round..making sure who gets all the atms of the world ejecting money at the same time..i won this one,took me 3 hours..i think this round's idea was sanchez's..mexicans love easy money and chaos..great guy too..one of coolest alumni of this collg..rite now im doin the 3rd task..posting my SOP on the collg site's homepage..its almost impossible to crack in the site,if u do it u are already in..but u cant get in,u have a clue..the collg has launched its journal and there is a pattern smwhr which says what time the site will be not firewalled..u can log in and post ur SOP then..u can try log in only 3 times..so no hit and try..i had a deduced the algo and cracked the pattern and now posting my SOP there..y am i taking a lot of time is because what i write on my SOP gonna decide, how and by whom im taken under mentorship when i join the collg...so its not a joke..i now hope,sir when u are reading it,take me as ur pupil.".samajhdaar ko ishaara kaafi hai"..so thr it is my SOP,on ur face....mind the spellings and grammar,i hope u guys have code to fix this problem..hoho....and also mindn the bluntness and lack of artistry in my writing,im not a fkn poet,thr r no hidden proses,dnt look for that..lets see u can figure a code inside..literature club of the collg is so not pickn me..do i fkn care..hoping the next task is challenging..

see you bastards,next summers..

lil.codey

ENTER..

42

i turned 24 today..i was not feeling that great about it and then..

ur fucked..said sm one..

im jus 24.i replied..if im 42 and still single...then im fkd..

or am i then?

so i thot it wud b actually cool to be single at 42..so here is what it wud be if i fk up real bad or real good..

so thats how i plan it to make it cooler for a loser 42 me..

i teach maths..class 9th 10th..thats the best time to nurture ur maths dream ..i will live the kid's dream..in 11th 12th u face the reality and reality i dnt digest that much..collg maths,no im not goin back to collg again,i promised that to myslf whn i graduated..

(plus 11th 12th ke liye padhna padhega fir se..)

so i liv nearby in a cottage provided by a boarding school near mussoorie..its co-ed..obviously..it cud hav been all girls..but i need boys to talk football when im high..u knw" i ws there whn we played at highbury n henry kissed the turf on its farewell match there which happend to b my 18th bday..stuff lik that..romance with the club and all" i can talk bacout dhoni hittn a 6 over long on to lift the 2011 wc at mumbai but trust me ,2015 script is better..i knw,im 42..i hav seen it all..

so the cottage..its 1st floor..studio apartment, terrace n balcony..i hav an old bullet which i only use to go to doon once in 3 months to meet parents and sm relatives..thy dnt get me much now..not new..i dnt get them too..so we drink on this randomness..and i come back..its good to see mum,she still looks beautiful..dad can stil drink more than me..

i dnt hav much furniture..a double bed(u nvr knw)..3 bean bags in balcony(u nvr knw again)..i call them been bags..cuz thy remind me of my had "been" youth..its a funny game i play wid myslf..fey fey i call it..derived from irony irony as fe is iron in chemistry n shit and ironical as it is,its my most hated subject..one antique cupboard..ek sheesha..the hookah i meant...my antique cupboard has an antique mirror too..u look young in that mirror,hell ya,it helps me survive..so thats pretty much it..yes thrz this old bookshelf..thr more books in that which i have not read than those which i have..smhow time nahn milta..hah..fey fey again..ul learn the game soon..and there is trippy..the man who runs my life..he cooks my dinner,laundry..get my stuff..i cnt do it widout him..thr are months whn i use my fone to call him only..so u get the basic idea of how fuckd iam..

on a typical mrng he wakes me up..we roll one together or he does as i still cant roll..people i hav tried,i jus cant..smoke and discuss worldly shit...

so in the mrng i teach kids basic maths..sm wed/thus i take a leav..its champ leag late nite and im an old man now..kids smtimes take my trip on arsenal when im grumpy n givin them random tuff ques on an un announced class test..but thy lov me,i mean who doesnt..i eat a heavy brkfast in school canteen with other teachers during recess cuz im hungry after the early mrng joint...so i skip lunch..random coke n chips n cigg here n there..im still cool..brkfast time i try and avoid other teacher's discussion about boring normal stuff..pension n pf and loans n in laws n not listening teenage daughters..hey did sm1 say a teenage daughter?

so ya..i pass a random remark here n there..people act as thy dnt care wt is say...but their eyes say it all..aftr fkn their day i move to 2nd half of the school day..i roll one more in a cigg,that much i can do..this is the best part..i have made fellow language teachers let me peek thru kids notebook..its fun reading their writings..and trust me syllabus hasnt changed much..read "apne pitaaji ko paise mangwane hetu patr likho" and the kid wrote 1 page full of letter..when in reality he wud jus text dad sayn 10k account plz? and a smiley if its a girl..but no he wrote a full page for that and got 4 on 5 as score...12 on 10 for hypocrisy..reading english is more challenging cuz the plays are decent and curriculum better..bullshit asides,the teacher is pretty..widowed ,so my future love interest..if i do tie the knot and say my vows at 46..it wud b wid her and thy wud b in good grammar..

so i read stuff n discuss it wid her,most of the time tryn to invite her to my place,but widows hav more issues than married ones,u cant cheat on a ghost i gess,but i dnt giv up..smtimes sm kids cm in for sm doubt..sm are genuine..sm nerds tryn to be cool..best is whn pretty girls cm wid a heavy idiotic doubt like is "sir,was hence proved reqd in the end or smthn?" and im lik wow she is cute..fk dnt judge me..thy too hav a crush on me..ok im 42 but im hot..im still lean,white hair..grey as she wud correct my grammar..marry n then correct me bitch..newaz..i wear a tweed jacket...grey brown...i cycle around in campus..this real old IMA bike painted red..twisted sense of humor,n a great collection of hats n mufflers..why am i single again?

so yeah..im doin bad ...but i hav a faded sense of reality as u can see..i still use facebook...ya its stil thr..zuckerberg died n sm arab sheik bought it..made some reforms thr,girls cant log in after 10 or smthn..people r revolting for freedom of facebook on facebook...thy jus wnt quit and use sm odr social network..world has gone crazy..so ya bout me..still facebookn,sm times i stalk my ex gfs,smtimes i see wt my old frnz r doin with their lives n kids..thy too r fkd but conventionally,u knw how society wants u to b fkd,wid taxes n mortgages n kids tuition fee,i mean fkd cuz u cant score is lookd down upon..i mean we are all fkd..y the segregation? fkn world..no point..literally..

besides that i write..ya..as random as alwaz..i hav been publishd..anonymous ofcourse..my 1st novel was named dropper in the rye..major success in pakistan..ya it still exists as a nation.

so..post school hours is the best time to see actually how a kids lif is shaping up..i predict their majors in collgs,their jobs..its funny again as i cudnt deduce mine..again..fey fey..smtimes i play football wid the guys..i still kick ass..pace has gone,vision as alwaz is thr in plenty..more like giggsy,ndr ironical reference..no he doesnt play nemore..but his son gyan does..wenger is plannin to sign him..yeah he is still thr n w hav won 28 titles now...still no champ league..we are cursed...thats the only explanation..that has to be the only explanation..

evening time i relax in my cottage..mussoorie is a great place to be..trippy n i drink at nites..no smkn up then..health issues,we are old,cm on..senior boys join us for drinks on a pretense of doubt sessions..these guys wil do good in life..i mean whosoever can trade calculus for rum can survive the sit that lies ahead in life..dinner is pretty much the same evrday,heavily carnivorous diet..sher abhi bhi ghaas nahn khaata..

so thats pretty much a daily day..wknds i dnt rembr..old habits..

so 42 doesnt look all gloomy to me..and its the answer to life anyway..

PS..a dedication to all trichy guys who are still single and finding it hard (the life i meant)..dnt worry..

Remember..

6₁₃ × 9₁₃ = 42₁₃

its an unlucky base...but then 10 hasnt helped us that much too..so stay calm and DON'T PANICK..

Adios..till i write again..

Douglas Adams..respect..

stoned shit

hot fuckd up weather on a mind fkd collg day,

days later goin to work while watchn d collg kids play..

cold winter nites wid no one to cling to,

what makes it worse is that ur outta rum too..

Sharing ur days last fkn ciggrt with five others,

drinking,gambling and to add to the guilt, concerned mothers..

Failed romances,broken hearts and dirty break up,

Fuck, its been five fkn years since ur team won a fkn cup..

While evryone else seems to be doin jus fine,

U hav given up so bad that u dnt even whine..

Depressing songs give u no fkn clue,

And the happy ones r jus too fkn happy for u..

Pink Floyd makes u believ othrs too r fkd as hell,

Aamir Khan,oh all is so not fkn well...

U cud hav been this or u cud hav been that,

Party less this wknd,whrz d rent for ur fkn flat?

Marriages,kids,loans,is thr any othr way to do..

Then one fkn day u die,and then ur fkd up lif was a lif too..

wish you were there..instead..

if pink floyd and weed is a cliche then its my favourite one for sure,fuck thy wrote all the good shit..main kya likhu ab..im tight,so much for the sober weekdays..well another bad day in the office..ironical..since i ws lookn for an office a couple of weeks back..only if i wud have lookd better ..and cuter too maybe..fuck...
so drank some rum and whisky plus 4 din ki nahn utari hai...rum got over a lil too quickly..y is the rum alwaz gone....

"hi iam shourya and im an alcoholic"..ok lil exaggeration ..
but trust me..i jus wished for rum as my girl..it alwaz givs me a good time..and even the bad ones are memorable..visious circle..faiz cudnt hav said it better"aaye kuch abr kuch sharaab aaye...uske baad aaye joh azaab aaye" if only i had written it...
trippy fact..a friend searched high hopes on youtube..1st result..srk has high hopes for kkr..i mean seriously..fuck..desh kya hoga? aur agar main desh ka bhavishya hu toh chud gaya desh..

so another year passed by..and trichy got over.. finally...FT score..Shourya Pande 1 NITT 0...u must hav had a good possession but what do u knw bout counter attacks...my best match by far..

so fuck u btech...i got u in the end..well not officially...but farre banaye thy yaar...pass ho hi jaunga is baar...

2011..u better be good...

rahul oberoi jus commented...bc dilli waale..so im thinkn..wt if i had an alter ego...saali cheez kya hogi woh...so aftr lotta thinkn this is the list i think my fkd up brain wud choose from...

1.a classy don lik LION...loin as i prefer..wts better than swimmin in ur own pool wearn a leopard printed thong,smokn pipes and thinkn ki "sona" kis beach pe aayega...pure ecstasy...fkn brilliant..

2. a 2nd world war veteran,either side..drinkn lonely in pubs wearn ur stars and gettin pissd for not finding the fkn reason i fought this war ...

3. james bond...jus for the fact that i actually get to introduce myslf as Bond James Bond...i mean u cnt get any action sayn hi im pande,shourya pande...trip saali..

4.bappi lehari,the lord of the rings...i mean i composed jimmy jimmy and disco dancer...i can liv wid that forvr...

5.a struggling poet...if ur good.u wnt struggle...so writn cheap poetry and njoyn that n feeln sad for the world who cnt get them...pyscho trip...or mayb a poet with hidden meanings..smthn lik namak ishq ka..a whole song dedicated to a blowjob..we all knw how gr8 a lyricist gulzaar sahib is but this jus takes him to a differnt unmatched level..i mean raat bhar piya se maanga maanga re namak ishq ka..beautiful..it got me thinkn..thr gotta be more such songs..i mean we indians are have a drity mind..we can think shit..il search for them..proses wid hidden meanings..and maybe if iam lucky,even a undercover protest song..newaz..ndr trip..

6.dharmendar...sunny deol aur booby deol mere bete hai...license to kill..

7.shah jahan... saala tajmahal hi mera hai..great feel..mughle azaam...kya chaiye aur..

yeah not thierry henry...khuda nahn ban sakte tum..

so 7C1..what a good week il hav..imagine goin to ur office and askn ur boss to get a martini..shaken not stirred..reminds me..

should sleep now..kal offc hai bc...i ws better unemployed...sacha hindustaani tha...gareeb aur berozgaar aur parsehaaniyo se ghira hua but then" we are paras captain,we are supposed to be surrounded"...what a fkn good line..Band of brothers kahan hai hard disk par? local terminal pe grep command de deta hu...fkn linux ki trip..im done..thats it i gess..before i get worse..

PS..those who read it tomrw..i ws drunk but fuck it..n ya happy 2011..n by happy u knw wt i mean..

till i write again..

adios 2010...i survived u..send a higher version now..

Marlboro Days

"its been a hard days nite" moaned Raj..it sill echoes in my ears..
he was right.. as alwaz..
Raj..sigh..the guy who started it all..he had a thing..he jus had to quote lines from famous songs preferably rock n roll or lame ass movie dialogues at the most inappropriate of times..i mean he introduced himslef to a bunch of girls, one fine saturday morning as "hey Iam Raj,naam toh suna hoga"..
the girls giggled..and he went cycling wid them..i jus stood thr,admiring his guts..and it was as late as next Monday morning in school we came to know that he was actually Dharamraj Tripathi but it was too late..his dad must have had a poor vocabulary or a bad sense of humour..but neverthless Raj was born..
Class 6th..when i first met him..life was easy but dull and monotonous at times..he brought some spark..a lot of spark actually..he was different but in a good way,a great way rather..popular owing to his good looks and bad behaviour..he was a visionary,a visionary ass..i always felt he cud see the future..

So here he was this new kid in class 6th and by class 9th,he had cemented his place in the brotherhood of lunatics of our school..the prestigious "brotherhood of lunatics or BOL in short"..no junior had ever set foot in its meeting and here was Raj, a member even before writing 10th boards..it was a big thing..BOL ws a hush hush gathering..kinda like the free masons..but only more secretive..it existed but we never evn tald about it..only Raj told me about that once..he cud confide in me..and i liked it..Ok back to BOL..
To be a member u needed to score 214 points..the scouts were there n the grading was tough..the seniors pried all the time,even whn u thought thy wrnt..


Before all that here is smthn about school and our dreaded history..Mr T short for Mr Tehar was an ex con now on a rehab,teaching troubled kids to whom he cud relate..ya he did sm time in Tehar for smthn we dnt knw..our school has "no record" policy!! And our school..well,all d students hav been to juvenile homes or have parents who are in prisons or sm troubled history wid the law..or rather lawlessness..so we wr the bad influence to the outside world..but we never cared about the outside world,thr was so much crap inside....so Mr T seemed dangerous and trust me he was..many thought he was in for molesting kids and traffing..so we took no chances..i on the otherhand found Mr T decent..but i too didnt take chances..im a gutless bastard..dats mayb y i admired Raj..




I remember the first time he entered d bad books of our teachers and by thus the good books of the BOL Jury..it was class 7th summer holidays..Mr T our dreaded history teacher gave us a summer project on The British Rule in India..no one gave a shit to summer project or holiday homeworks..girls n gays did it..the guys here were not academically inclined..why play wid books whn u hav rifles at home..

so neways..while everyone was making projects on the British Rule in India,Raj was making plans..plans to go to Britain..we didnt see him for another 2 months..and on the day of project submission he gave a photo album to Mr T named THE BRITISH RAJ..it was aftr 2 days we came to knw that the album had pics of Raj in Britain doing stuff that a normal british teenager wud do..album ended wid a note scribbled in a manner u cud make out it meant spite..the note read

"the british moved on..so should we"..

no guts no jury..

So the jury was impressed..He scored 37 points for it..thats jus the starting and now he set for motion..how he scored the other 177 points is intellectually and emotionally overwhelming..such an easy climb for him..sounds so stupid now..but back then, we wr kids and skateboards n friendship bands wr cool..so there u go..it was a fkn big deal..discussion over..

He however needed anothr 300 points to be the greatest ever.."THE MADCAP"..
The legend goes that "the madcap" wears an orange cap with M embroidered on it..

"i dnt lik orange plus i gotta do smthn out of the world to be the gr8st evr,stupid pranks dont count" dats wt he had said whn i askd him why he wasnt tryn for the Madcap..


You must be wonderin why its all bout Raj..well as i said..he started it..but thr are other characters in this story too..
There was Atin Cheema..he joined our school late..class 7th from London..that made me realise that thr r fellons in "abroad" too..i thought apna desh hi chuda hai...newaz Atin..he was tall,lanky,handsome and most importantly had a motorbike..james dean of our school,he had been convicted of drunk driving before,wel thats what he confessd a year later..he introduced us 8th graders to booze,bikes,marlboros,leather jackets n girls..hero tha saala.. Atin was diffrnt..polar opposite of Raj..he never cared for us or any1 for that matter..well i dnt blame him, ur not that matured in school for fucks sake..i liked him then..he had money..xtra money..which he spent on us..

And then thrs me..im d most gutless guy ul evr cm across..Both of these managed changin me for good or for bad..i dont talk that much n before they happend i hardly talkd..no parents,no family..my criminal history..i ws in for taking a shot at my foster dad wid a golfclub..i dnt rembr that and Atin feels the club must hav been "1 wood" cuz me hitting sm1 is a
long shot..Atin had a twisted sense of humour..newaz according to the report i hit him twice because he wudnt let me see Kuch Kuch Hota hai on Zee TV..i mean dats bullshit..ok i love that movie or any Shah Rukh Khan movie for that matter but i cant hit sm one..i mean in school i have nevr pushd or evn talkd in a loud aggressive tone wid anyone..im jus a regular kid who lovs his movies..
so i knew jus these two..why they hung out with a loser lik me,i dnt knw..
odrs thought that i was crazy..thez two didnt..cuz mayb thez two were crazy too..well i see a shrink too.."doc" as i call him says that i have a rage disorder and delusions but he thinks im recovering..good for me..




Day 0..

"why so serious?" asked RAj and he lit his Marlboro ..

Atin looked low..he hardly was serious..and even if he was he would not show it..
"nothing" ignored Atin..
"bol bhi de jaan!!" teased Raj..
"gods a whore..i mean its always wid the people who have money.." he suggested.."and pass me my lighter"
"heavy" i meekly added..
" but you have money right? it works for u" Raj complained..
"when did i say its not workn for me?? im jus worried for the poor!!" Atin countered back
"the hell you are!!" shouted Raj..

Both of them looked ready for a heated discussion again,it was fun watching them together..thy wr lik R+ and OH-....super charged individually and created awsmnes when together..ok my chemistry sucks but u get the point right..

"so u dnt think gods a whore?" asked Atin.."whats ur take on God?"

"this wud be interesting" i thought..i lit my Marlboro Red..

"well we have quite a generation gap,me n god..we dnt get along..i mean we dnt listen to our parents most of the time cuz thr ideas are outdated..why listen to smthn dat ws preached thousand of yrs back..its bullshit" Raj stood thr as if he was delievrng a speech..

"so u got daddy issues!!" confirmed Atin
"na..papa dnt preach!!" i ws waitn..he had to quote..
"wt bout u?" he asked me..
"huh?"
"wt bout u saale..wts ur take on god?"
"i dnt knw..i think Raj is right"
"ya go suck Raj's dick"
"oh..u jus pissd cuz he wont suck ur lil dick..?" Raj sneered..
Male ego..it is under rated..men wnt accept it and women wnt bother findn out,thy too r busy wid their shoes.. ..we need a 3rd sex in the equation..
3rd sex..wudnt that jus change the dynamics..how wud be define sex ratio then..a person cud be trisexual then..i lik the permutations..plus hopefully thr wud b more sex then..shit do i need to get laid..?

"ur a fkn ass!!" shouted Atin..
"im Butt James Butt".. Raj in English accent
"Bugger off"
"Bollocks"
"teri pehn di"
"Army!!"
"Arirforce!!"
"Army!!"

it went on for hours..the dual..
thats the first memory i have of us 3 together..these two arguing smoking marlboros..n thats me in the corner..now i sound lik Raj..newaz so that night i understood one thing..it wud be fun with thez three around..Raj, Atin and Marlboros..


Marlboros got us together..its the first cigarette i smoked and nevr changed it..we smoked Marlboros and only Marlboros..i remember the day whn i had my first drag..it wasnt that pretty..not poetry in motion..i was edgy n nervous..its lik having sex for the first time..its kinda difficult,ur not great or confident..doesnt feel that awsm as u had thought n it gets over a lil too soon..and no doubt the 2nd time is alwaz better and u always improve..but u alwaz rembr ur first time..unless u wr drunk and wasted..and im talkn bout both the cases here.. (i jus read cosmo a lot)..
so i rembr,Atin n Raj were smokn there in their room..i askd for a drag..Raj offered his Marlboro Red..n i never looked backed..i got so high on it,i remember talkn a lot that night..we 3 made a pact that we will only smoke Marlboros..we even refer to our cigarettes as Marlboros..
"its not a cigarette if its not a Marlboro.."





Day 1..

class 8th summer holidays..


"its been a hard days nite" moaned Raj..
we had been workn..NGO..social service..govt wants us rehab kids to do social labour..so tired of workn the whole day we wr lyn on our bean bags smokin Marlboro Reds..Atin was havng Marlboro gold special edition,style quotient..he offers us..
"baap ka paisa hai,padhe padhe sadh jayega" taunts Raj..he jus has to quote sm famous movie line or a song..told u,he had a thing..
"fuck..sex karna hai "shouted Atin..he is the horniest guy i hav ever seen..im sure he is gettn some but he wil stil complain..pig..
"my sex life these days is lik McDonalds..self service and no variety" pointed out Atin,he looks at me,"oye..u got ne slutty female friends??"
bastard teases me again..he knws i dnt knw a single girl..ok trust me..im straight..but girls..im jus plain scared of them..who wanna date me newaz..i dnt luk good,dnt hav money..cnt evn speak properly..
"i feel lik killn whoevr heads this NGO thing..i mean thy make us work for shit" Raj was pissed..
"You jus cant go around killing people" Atin suddenly sounded lik a nun..
"Impossible is Nothing" Raj quoted again
"ok maybe you can kill but you ll get caught"Atin spat back..
"kyo kanoon ke haath lambe hote hai isliye?" Raj demanded..

"you cant handle the truth!!" Atin..tryn to give Raj his shit back..
"what truth?" Raj demanded..
"that ur not perfect.. the perfect murder doesnt exist..nothing is perfect.." he added,
"except American tobacco maybe"
he lighted another one..

Raj seemed offended..

ok u dnt challenge Raj..not when he is pissed..not anytime..he takes it to his heart..and he has a big heart..Atin knew it..but then he was a dick smtimes..

Raj stood up..he seemed ready for the challenge..i cud feel the tension building..both thez guys had major ego issues..n pride was at stake..
"il perform the perfect murder" he promised to Atin..he had a twinkle in his eye..as if he could see it..
"i bet my life on that..you cant do it.."invited Atin..
"hit me" Raj commented..the gambler in him was speaking..too much blackjack..
"this is madness" i said to Raj..
"madness..this is Sparta!!" shouted Raj,slammed the door with his foot n marched out..i remember Jethro tull playn aqualung smwhr in the background at that time..the air jus didnt feel right..


Day 2
class 9th summer break


"dnt study if u dnt want to,stop pretending" barked Raj

i woke up with a jerk..so did Atin..
"i was studyn" Atin defended himself..
"Geometry?? lik a novel? " mocked Raj,.."mental maths brother mental maths.." Atin smiled.."newaz Marlboro hai?"
"oh i hav quit smoking" Raj answerd
"did ur girlfriend tell u to quit?" Atin smiled..
"what gf?" i looked at Raj..
"no one" Raj ws about to leave..
"Miss Jailan" Atin sighed
" How do u knw?" Raj turned back and askd..
i ws perplexed..hurt rather..how come Raj didnt tell me..
"i went thru ur mobile last night..lovey dovey texts by Jailan..whos she?" Atin was enjoyn himself..
"who the fuck is she ? and what kind of name is Jailan??" i asked..i wanted answers..
"so since its public now..i gess its not a secret nemore" Raj sat down and took one Marlboro out..
"tell me more,tell me more" Atin sang..well Grease is the word..

"i met her in my last juvenile home.." sighed Raj "since i first saw her in a jail..i call her Jailan..she is most beautiful girl i knw.."
"u dnt knw many girls dude.." Atin smirked..
"a thing of beauty is joy forever" Raj quoted Keats..
"so u in lov?" i lookd shocked..
"pyaar to hona hi tha" Raj again..
"so thats her letters dat u recieve n burn after reading?" Atin asked..
"yeah!!" Raj shot back..
"i thot thoz wr ur answer sheets.." Atin laughed again..
"you cud hav told me?" i felt cheated..
"ho ho..dnt worry il save ur number as jailan in my mobile" Atin said..he was such a dick..

after that day i was jailan for Atin..he re named me..Atin had an uncanny influence on other batchmates when it came to loserness..so the whole school called me Jailan from that day..

we never met the actual Jailan tho..who she was..whr she was..what was her real name..no one knew..we two alwaz asked Raj about her..
one day he jus dismissed us by sayn "a thing as perfect as her cudnt be for real.." he was almost in tears..we nvr askd about her again..

So now i was the only Jailan in his life...





Day 3


"i hate my fuckn name" screamed Raj.."everytime i write Dharamraj Tripathi on my answer sheet i feel lik puking.."

"then puke,maybe ul feel better..plus answer sheet pe ugal de jo andar hai tere,number hi aa jayeng kuch"Atin wid his witty remarks..

"fuck off..this is serious!!" Raj sounded upset...
"whats in a name.." Atin tried mimmickng Raj..

"im changn my name before 10th boards..cant live bein Dharamraj all my life..u got ne good names.." Raj was serious..

"i knw u wnt agree to watvr i say..so what dnt u jus ask ur bitch.." Atin lighted his marlboro gold "wt say jailan?"

"hmmm..i dnt knw..Rahul maybe.." dats d first name that came into my mind..i mean Raj nahin to Rahul..told u im a sucker for SRK..

"why do u evn lik karan johar's gay movies?" Atin dismissd the idea.." u have a fkn KKHH's poster in ur room!! seriously!!"

"Rahul it is then" Raj concluded..he jus had to negate Atin plus takin my side would help build my lost self confidence..loved him for that..

"call me Rahul from today"..Raj lighted his Marlboro Red..

"im calln you Raj only..ask jailan to suck ur dick!!"

So from that day i tried him Rahul but it was tough..he would alwaz be Raj..





D Day..

class XIIth boards hav finished..i cudnt giv them..im in a mental asylum/prison..i hav been declared unstable..n ya importantly, i hav been found guilty..every one believes that a couple of months back i killed Atin..every one but Raj..cuz he knows i didnt..as he did it..right in front of me..i saw him smashing Atin's head twice with a golf club somehow wid my fingerprints on..
"no motive,jus rage.." thats what Raj had told to the judge and the doc who has been treating me..
i read the doc's report..i must say..i ws impressed..this is the most unrealistic medical report that you wud ever cm across ur fuckn life..
it read something like...
"Atin Cheema killed in a violent act of rage in the most bizzare circumstances..the guilty

,delusioned and suffering from chronic pain, hallucinated his whole life as nothing but as the

movie Kuch Kuch Hota hai..
according to the guilty's subconcious mind, following parts were playd by the real life persons..

Rahul (the ever so charming)
T.I.N.A by A.T.I.N ( the new comer from london)
A.N.J.A.L.I by J.A.I.L.A.N (the old best friend now in discomfort)

According to his unstable subconcious .Tina got too closed to Rahul,much too closed for Anjali's comfort..Tina had to die according to

the movie's plot..and so here the guilty, to make the movie happen, took action in his own hands..

And seeing guilty's history for violent conduct and delusions and finding evidences to support

these assumptions and also the hard evidences lik guilty's fingerprints on the golfclub used in

the act of crime and Rahul Tripathi's testimony as a witness..we find Shourya guilty and mentally unstable"

absurd right?? i mean how can any one fall for such crap but it has happend as even the doc knws im such a sucker for shah rukh and karan johar crap..

Raj came to meet a month later in the asylum..he looked diffrnt..we sat down across the hall..my

hands were locked..but i cud bum a marlboro..i askd for one..he offrd me marlboro gold special edition..

"u smoking special editions now?" i asked..
"i miss Atin" he replied..

i felt lik punching him..

"so evrythn ws a lie uh?" i enquired..

he didnt reply..

"was thr any Jailan or any girl..wr u ever in love??"i wanted answers..

"thr was no girl in the jail u dumbfuck..thr ws no jail..i jus came up with it cuz it went well with Atin-Tina crap..changing my name to Rahul on ur wish..knowing ur history for delusions n rage ..it was as easy as anything and dont ask me how i got ur fingeprints on the golf club.."..he leaned back n lit his Marlboro..

"how did u knw that the judge and the doc will buy this crap,its such a stupid plot?" i questioned

again..

"this is India son..SRK sells here" he smiled and took a long drag.."aur waise bhi saare acche plots par to ghar ban gaye hai..main khud kiraaye pe rehta hu.." he sounded like Atin..crap again..

"so why r u here today Raj?"

"to tell u that u are safer in here" he assured me...bastard.." oh baby baby its a wild world!!"

"so all this just for a stupid bet?" i wanted closure..
"ok idiot listen..i wanted prove that the perfect murder exists..and i did it..perfect murder is
not getting caught..its making someone else fall for it.." vintage Raj..quoting crap from some novel or a movie..

"lif is not a movie ,u fucker" i raised my voice..

"you are the last person who shud say that.." he started laughing lik a lunatic...


" and it wasnt jus a bet,life was callin me" he added,"as i once said, i wanted to do smthn out of

the world,stupid pranks dont count!!"

And he got up..wore his orange cap with M embroidered on it..and started leavn..
"Hasta la vista, baby"
"all this for a fkn cap..wt about Atin's death,what about me,how do u feel about that??" i

shouted from behind..

"kuch kuch hota hai anjali...tum nahn samjhogi"..and the Madcap jus whistled past the guards ..

Na kaleni, suka!!!

so iam bored and broke..things i can do..
1.learn some instrument..yeah rite..
2.work out..id rather make out..
3.download porn..naah..hard disk full,im tired of deleting music for orgies..
4.drink/score..im broke..
5.write..yeah im bored..

stuck in doon..using "stuck" here cud b a lil harsh(i ws in trichy few days back,sorry shaktiman)..ok i mean doon is a nice city..good weather..good food..good girls..plus im at home..khaana pina lodging laundry free..so its not that bad..but im fkn bored..meri marzi..mera blog..
so im gonna jot down randomly..league started again(har saal shuru ho jaati hai)..but no football today..mayb after a treble or a double..a double in england is parlay in america..fkn too much online gambling..won 0.6 $ on ladbrokes,6 kings aa gaye haath mein..but im on detox..things u do at home..last cigarette smoked was 3 days back..jus watchn pics of famous ciggrt brands online.."tasveere tum le jaao..yaadein main le jaata hu"..watched KNPH again..reminds me of my hrithik roshan phase..even had a poster of him..
Other posters i had in my old jalandhar room..
1.sachin tendulkar
2.jordan
3.Thierry Henry
4.Thierry Henry(again)
5.van nistelrooy(brother is a useless utd fan)
6.Michael Owen(sportstar mein aaya tha laga liya)
7.david bechkam(yes im gay)
8.the beatles
9.jonty rhodes
10.Zizou..
11.sunny deol(hoho,gotcha)

clearly im devoid of any ideas..but no alt+f4..stil got haf an hour worth crap inside of me..what can i write about..???
life..well waiting for the joining cud b boring too..my parents think i didnt get a job n im jus buyn time chilln at home..my gf thinks im not cmin to pune(ever ever in d world)..trust issues i tell u..dats all i can rite bout lif..nthns happening..can rite bout after life mayb..a houri awaits me..who knws..
crap crap crap..so il jus go..fastforward..

year 2025AD..im a famous movie director living in milan(no i still support arsenal).. married to my 2nd wife Beatrice née Del Toro,italian model with mexican ancestery along with my son junaid from my 1st wife amatallah an afghan reporter(who i met during the filming of my blockbuster "kabul ki duaayeen leti jaa" n who was later kidnapped(n i hope not raped) by the taliban for making love wid an infidel(me)..junaid is planning to join FBI to kill his mother's killers(i hope not rapists) and mayb run for US president as any1 cud b a POTUS these days..lets see how that works out..
so its drizzling outside..i come out of my heatef indoor pool after a delightfull swim session wid beatrice(me stud me)..light my cuban(no mom,i havnt quit smoking) and realize that i have an interview scheduled with TIME(mba coaching waala nahn saalo) when my maid Jacquelyn(french) tells me that a magazine's reporter is waiting outside..fuck i gotta an interview with them..memory loss..a symptom of the rich..
"hello sirji"
"sir JI..desi??" my mind runs..i look at him..fuck..a mid 30 male indian..bald,ghissu..i ws hoping for a femme fatale,well nevermind..
"hey" i act disinterested..im rich..
"is it the right time?" he asks..bloody diplomat..
"TIME is always right uh.." i retort..mixing pun with humor,dats what made me rich i mean..along wid selling coke to african kids but dats another story and dats y i wnt let junaid join FBI..engineer bano..dats what my father said..dats wt il say.
he smiles unknowingly..i bet he didnt understand wt i said..bloody low iq..bc kisko bhej diya richard ne..
"so wts ur name? u seem new?" i try n put d guy in ease..its not the 1st time that TIME is interviewing me..
"vinod khanna" he hisses back..there is smthn bout this guy..i search his name on my blackberry..lotsa results on the real vinod khanna..some amar akhbar anthony n vardi's songs links on youtube too..
finally i got it..vinod khanna..assistant reporter TIME magazine..worked for amar ujaala before that,known for his grindin interview skills,some say mayawati made sure that he landed a job in TIME so that he wud stop harassing her on her UP nav nirmaan yojna....i knew it..there ws smthn in his eye..
"toh shuru karein sirji?"
"hindi mein??"..mere tashan..
"sirJI main hindi main poochunga,aap english mein jawaab de..thodha adjust karein..so shall we start??"
"why not!!" im nervous..trust me..
"chori on kakori express..movie ka naam aisa kyo..poori movie mein koi chori nahn,koi kakori express nahn..sirf nasha aur nanga naach..KYO KYO??"
"well u c.. chori on kakori express==COKE..its not jus a move to dodge d censor board..d movie depicts young kids addicted to drugs..d same nation for which d congress looted the kakori express..a free india,a young india..and d movie depicts drugs n sex instead..yeh movie hatke hai..its a satire u c.." kya chuttad question poocha saale ne..i ws prepared for that..
"waah waah..ji bilkul..to fir itna ghuma fira k naam kyo rakha..seedha nashey ka zehrilla chumma,aisa kuch kyo nahn?"
"well u c..we cnt be dat direct..audience shudnt just judge the movie on its name..thr shud b sm twist evn if thrz no plot..n mine had two..one running back in colored n other runnin forward in black n white..its 1st time smthn lik that had happnd.." i lean back..
"sir aisa kuch memento mein bhi hua tha..haina??" the bastard sneers..
"well thats diffrnt..memento had the same plot..we had 2 diffrnt plots..1st is a young kid taking revenge n getting his dads empire back by killing villain's one daughter n roamancing the other n the second includes d same kid getting killed and his rich "hamshakal" taking revenge after his lover spots him in new zealand and falling for the same gir,rembr sirJIl..in between thr is lotsa drugs n sex which depicts nations problems"
"sir plots kuch jaane pehnchaane nahn hai? aur kuch sense bhi nahn ban rahi aapas mein..audience ek baar mein kuch samajh nahn paai..aisa KYO KYO??"
"well u c..its no doubt a dedication to baazigar and kaho naa pyaar hai but the cinematography is totally diffrnt...
the one dat looks lik baazigar has hrithik roshan and the movie runs in black n white..while d odr 1 has SRK n runs backward and theres a script too..its completely diffrnt..plus d songs r not same..we hav usd old classic duran duran and aerosmith hits to appeal to our offshore audience..its a new look wid retero appeal and non linear approach dat makes this movie a modern classic.."
"kuch bhi?"
"dats rakesh roshans new movie..no comments"..hoho..dat was gud..
"sirJI mera matlab aap kuch bhi bolenge ab..aapki movie kisi ko samajh nahn aai..uska kya jawaab hai?"
"well not evry1 understands laws of motion..doesnt mean einstein ws a shithead?"..i shud b a lawyer..
"newton.." he smiles
"jee woh ek puraani adaakaara hai..unko beech mein naa laaye.."
"behenchod!!!"
"is this on the record?" i enquire..
"sir scotch ho jaaye..tension ho gayi hai"
badha kutta aadmi hai..
"old monk chalegi?" vinod khanna ko lodha scotch pilaunga main..
"sir kuch bhi de do..mix mat karna apni movie ki tareh..tikke lagwa do..subah se kuch nahn khaya"
bastard..no doubt he handled mayawati..
"i dnt eat non veg on sunday..pea nuts kha lo?" main kam kutta hu..
"nimbu dalwa dena"
i order all this to Jacquelyn and spank her on her way back..dnt get me wrong..dats jus a code..now she wil spit in vinod's drink n make it small instead of usual large..
he asks random off d record questions till d time being..Jacquelyn cms wid d drinks and serves us..i spank her again on her way back..get me wrong..my maid, my blog..
interview restarts..
"y the multiple endings..Y Y??" he sips n barks..chadh gayi saale ko,daru pi ke english shuru..
"well multiple plots..multiple endings.." i answer as if its obvious..
"but the movie shud hav 1 ending,i mean me n my wife watchd d movie on 2 diffrnt screenings..n later whn we discussd..we fought ovr the endings as it ws diffrnt in our cases..had a fite..we almost had a divorce..y did u do that?"
"abey tum dono saath movie nahn dekh rahe..fite tumhari already hai,divorce mere naam kyo,meri khud do shaadiya hai.." i start in hindi..mujhe chadh gayi??
"he he he..sirJI small thi kya yeh..jaldi utar gayi.." saala lagta puraana darubaaz hai..
i order sm more..spanking continues..
"so how many endings r there??"
"well ek meri..ek producer ki..ek shaqeel bhai ne bola tha ki marine drive pe bomb blast sequence ho end pe..junaid ke liye pokemon waali..ek aad aur hogi..aapki kaunsi thi??"
"the 1 whr ET goes back.."
"well woh stevie ne idea diya..theme hai ki sab waapis chale jaate hai...."
"lik SRK leavn NASA n returnin to India ?" he shouts back
"exactly.." i lik him now...a lot can happen over booze..he winks..gay..
"aakhri sawaal...kabse join kar sakta hu sir?"
"i think he is perfect" whispering..
"aaj se.."
jab karna ho max impress..Fair & Lovely Max Fairness..



PS..badhe badhe deshon mein aisi choti choti baatein hoti rehti hain senorita..